First of all, Seattle is in the state of Washington,
not Oregon, and from north to south this is how it is:
Washington, Oregon, California
We have hot and cold running water, flush toilets,
and superb summers which we spend naked.
We are a real place, maybe not as sophisticated as you,
but likely more liberal.
So how do the liberals take the horrendous outcome of
the Supper Bowl? Well, they aren't called the
Pittsburgh Stealers for nothing.
Let's just say, the refs weren't a conspiracy, but they
sure better not show their faces around here,
because we'd really do a liberal number on them, like:
"Oh, you poor guys, what stress you must have been under?
How horrible for you. Have a latte. We know you feel as
bad about causing our loss as we do."
Yes, we know that these officials were brought up in
a school system where everyone got an A so no one
felt bad, everyone was a winner, and so when they
get into difficult situations, they cave in to
But we understand their anguish, and forgive them
for ruining our lives.
Yes, if the Seahawks had won, they'd return with lots
of money, endorsements, and raise the profile of our
lovely area attracting lots of out of state visitors
But instead, we'll remain in our swampy dank little
backwater state, wet liberals to the west,
dry conservatives to the east, and all STARVING!
If only Bill Gates had played football in high school,
then we might have had a chance.